The Scripts We Sign Up For & Letting Go (Substack Writings)

We’ve all signed up for scripts of what the perfect things should be in life. But life rarely turns out exactly as we planned. Sometimes we need to let go of what we signed up for so we can make space for something new.

Scripts We’ve Signed Up For

Something that’s been on my mind lately, as I release old beliefs and make space for a new chapter, is the idea of scripts and expectations that we sign up for, especially early in life.

It’s the script of a perfect life, a perfect family or career and more — and the expectations that come with it. That’s a normal thing we all carry. I remember as a teenager wanting this dream of the perfect family life, with a vision of exactly what that looked like. But alas, that wasn’t my story, and for a long time that gap felt like loss.

Finding Meaning 

And yet, while I grieved for a time the heavy deviations from my early scripts, I wouldn’t change a thing. Because while my actual childhood and early adult years had their traumatic moments, they were beautiful in ways that even today I marvel at and am so proud of. They forged me into the person I am today, expanded my capacities and talents, set me on course to a deeper alignment, and let me see sides of my family members that I’m incredibly proud of to this day. They revealed a kind of incredible inner resilience, compassion, and love in each other that I don’t know I would’ve seen otherwise.

That doesn’t justify the hard parts, but it is something I can sit with in awe. In spite of the difficulty, we came out stronger, and that’s something to be incredibly proud of — something I only would’ve seen had I not been too focused on the perfect script.

Holding on Too Tight

So while it’s normal and natural to hold early scripts and expectations in high regard, the challenge is when they become so rigid that we grasp for what we envisioned, comparing everything we experience today against that, and miss what’s being offered in the present moment — even as it comes in different forms and packages. We miss the lessons in the quiet moments. We even miss the people and situations presented to us that deviate from the old script, introducing something new.

The Cleanup Work

So if you’re like me, in the middle of preparing for a new chapter with more intention than before, sit with and examine your scripts and expectations. Check them against your present moment. Are you holding on too tight? Do they need to be released, or just given more space to breathe? Whatever you decide, remember: the past is a memory, the future is a story yet to be written, and the present is all we have. That’s why they call it a gift.

To the present moment. 🤍 ~ C

If you want to read more on life transitions and letting go, check out our Wisdom in Transition series here.