Prioritizing What Matters (Substack Writings)

If you’re getting ready to enter a blockbuster cycle or busy season like I am, and you have the time and space to plan ahead, take it, here’s how:

Lessons from the past

I’ve been lucky enough to know, in life, when I’m entering busy, dynamic cycles that will demand major effort from me. What I haven’t always done well though is protect my well-being inside of them — I’ve let the busy overwrite what should’ve come first. Looking back, I can see where I took on too much, spread myself thin, didn’t delegate, wasn’t deliberate enough about my own time. There were valid reasons for all of it. But another way was likely possible — because the cost was the present moment with the version I was then and those I love, and that doesn’t come back. We can’t go back and be there for that graduation, that first show, that promotion, that first day of class, that concert. There’s only so much time to actually be present — for the person you are now, and for the people you love. And that time is now. Not tomorrow.

So this time, heading into a major cycle, I’m doing something different: using the space and time I have now to get clear on how I want to show up, and building strategies to actually do it — so I stay true to what matters.

Figuring out what’s important

If you’re approaching your own busy or blockbustery season, here’s what I’m considering:

Know thyself. What type of person are you in busy, dynamic cycles and seasons? Are you fully hands-on, all in — the vision, the plan, and the executor — the engine across the board? Action Call: What’s one responsibility you could hand off this cycle without it costing you what you actually care about?

What’s most important? What are your non-negotiables — time with family and friends, being present for the big moments, the vacations that recharge you or bring you together? Action Call: Which specific dates or timeframes, this cycle, are you willing to block off before anything else claims them? What routines do you want to build to protect this time?

Where are your loved ones at? Aging parents who need you nearby, family members who need your fuller attention, people who you support in less visible ways. Action Call: What has changed for the people you love since your last busy cycle, and does your plan actually account for it?

A New Rhythm

I’ve found that once I started to get in the rhythm of naming what’s important, it got easier to spot my real priorities in any given moment — and to see where compromise was possible versus where it wasn’t. And that’s where creativity comes in. We tend to assume things have to be handled one way, or by one person, and that assumption is often the only thing standing in the way of a better solution.

For me, creativity meant saying yes to a slower-paced project — one that looked less ambitious than what I’d normally take on. But that slower pace made room for self and family support, and it ended up defining my priorities for the busier cycle ahead. A slow down to speed up is what I called it. And I wouldn’t have found that solution acceptable if I hadn’t prioritized grounding myself within first, healing and family first. That grounding era is exactly what I needed — what ended up reigniting my dreams, allowing me to align with them more intentionally and authentically than ever before.

And that’s available for all of us. But it’s up to us to build that space in, to do this planning intentionally, to release expectations and be open to creative solutions.

Special Note on Creative Solutions: Community

Part of what we’re all learning to build for ourselves in this era is true community — our village, tribe, 21st century support systems, whatever word fits. Trusted family and friends who genuinely love, care and show up for each other. As we build that for ourselves, it does something powerful: it releases the expectation that we have to do this alone, inside a single nuclear unit or only with the people in our immediate vicinity. It expands our support system beyond just us. And that expansion is one of the most creative and powerful solutions available to us.

How does that help with our priorities? It becomes the modern support system. One where we don’t have to sacrifice and compromise in big ways, where we don’t have to put ourselves last because we now have a village to rely on. The way our ancestors envisioned it — maybe they were onto something.

To what matters. ~ C 🤍